Archive for February, 2012

9 month report of Carlitos and Edie

Benjamin Franklin once said: “Well done is better than well said”

so let me introduce you our past month from the view of Carlitos and Eduardo and their improvements

Carlitos:

  • Carlitos is growing rapidly with the smile on his face
  • He has 3 teeth bottom and before reaching 10 month, he started to grow 3 teeth up….so start to be big fun to breathfeed him. Every time we have our time, I can feel how many teeth more he got :) But lovely. It will never come back
  • He is eating already 4 times per day. He has breakfast, lunch, afternoon snack and also dinner, Rest of the time he has still his loved milk. He is very well eater, he is able to consume about 300 ml of food. Which is a lot. He started also with peaces, It is funny to see him how he is enjoying pasta, or roll……it is everywhere, but he is loving it. He loves to be trying new things and also new tastes. Which is great……I am looking forward the time when I will be cooking only one things for all of us. But luckily I have big helper Edie, who is cooking and preparing with me. Big Chef :)
  • Carlitos biggest toys: small balls in the playgrounds, football ball in our home. He is able to be chasing it for hours all around our home. In this sense his behavior seems for me like of grown up man, because they are able to be running after “something” until they will  not get it :) His another favorite game is to take stuff out of shelf and draws. Edie did it a bit, but Carlitos masters this. So we used to have in the end of the day on the ground everything what you can imagine. Boxes all around, clothes from the draws, he is resorting my pots in the kitchen……….and simply seems to be that he just prefers his own order rather than mine. Mom you have it wrong!
  • Carlitos is very social. Especially today I realize how lucky I am. We spend half of the day in the huge indoor kids playground place. And Edie he was running with the older kids in the big slides and tunnels and Carlitos was with smaller once crawling all around. He just called me while he was hungry or had “full diaper”. Otherwise he was making new friendships with other kids and adults. Nice I have time for coffee and nice cake :)
  • Since he likes music, he is reacting on it if I start to sing or play radio. And he is very social. So I felt to give him more chance to join some activity which will combine these two atributes. So we joined Yamaha Classes (see the video) in KMC (Cultural and Maternity center Knoflik) here close by of our home.
  • And last but not least thing, Carlitos is about to walk. He is standing on his own without help and we are just waiting for him to do the first step, so lets see.
  • Carlitos on the snow:

Eduardo

When I was thinking what everything has happened in his last month I am thinking more in stories, so in that case let me say you few:

snow time 

  • Every time I am coming for him and picking him from kinder I hear: Nechci maminku, Nechci domu (I do not want mami, I do not want to go home). So I guess that he is happy in the kindergarden and that he is enjoying his time there. Already during the weekend I am usually listening, Let’s go and see our teacher! …..you know primarily I felt bad, that he does not like me, or that he does not like the time with me. But now I stopped to take it personally and I am more happy that he is enjoying there and that I do not have to be suffering while leaving him there.
  • Eduardo’s big friend is called Vojta Vomacka. They are very good friends. Vojta is few month older. He is born in September so from Edie it is 5 month. Though he is not any bigger by size. But he is a bit stronger and faster. The curious thing is that they are either playing nicely together or beating each other. With full passion. And even they beat each other in few minutes after they are best friends again and they want to be together playing.
  • Edie love aunties and their kids. He loves to spend time with our friends so what I feel is that we are much more start to make reunions with other families. Our nice friends are family Martinez with their two kids. Sabina age 3 and David age 6 month. So they have very small difference with our kids and also their couple is mixed. Father is from Colombia and mom is Czech close to Ostrava. We are sharing similar life style, I go with mom Hanicka to play tenis so we can keep fit as well :) And Edie with Sabina and Carlitos with David are enjoying their time nicely as well.
  • I tested with Edie his joy from cooking. I took him for cooking lecture. It was more or less successful, He enjoyed to be mixing pudding and soft mixed drinks. But I had feeling that it is early for him to do some organized activities.

  • Edie is great observer. He loves to be watching other kids while they are doing some activity. For example, he was very nice during the performance of yamaha classes in theatre, he love theatre in general. The atmosphere is able to drag him and make him calm. While I asked him if he would like to attend these classes and be performing like other kids he said NO. So i has time.  Same experience we got while going skating with him. When I asked him to try it with me, his answer was NO. But he was happy to be watching me and other kids skating. So I will be happy to find activity he will enjoy in the future. Seems to be for me that he will join activities while having friends involved as well.
  • Thought Edie proved to be fighter and persistent. I like that he is enjoying his bicycle and we are cycling even outside is lot of snow.  He fall many times and also many times stood up.  But still he wanted to keep going. So it looks for me that while he enjoyes some activity he is able to keep on. I think.
  • The less unconfortable think is that he is still fighting with Carlos. We do not know why but he prefers only momi. He is pushing him away if I am close by. He does not want to speak Spanish unless I start to speak too.Many times he is really not nice to him and I see Carlos be down by that. But only reason I think is that he does not have enough time spend with him and that Edie does not have that much opportunity to have fun and possibility to create strong connections with him. But who knows!?
  • Another trouble time is when Edie has his “agains everything time” Sometimes is in the morning, as my mom is saying “he woke up with his bottom up” sometimes is when he is tired or hungry. Or when he wants something and I do not want to give it to him or allow him to do something. Then he start to be fighting with us, saying NO for everything and be in opposition. While reaching this moment He is driving me crazy. And I have to say that now only once my nerves get big hit so he got punished. But after he was fine but my internal feeling was not nice. I know that I need to show him respect to me and that sometimes this is the way to tell him “that is enough” but it is hard. So once I speak about this moments with my friend. Which has same problems with her son. And she told me something what I started to apply and it works. You know Zlata:“When my son start to yell that he wants something or he tries to go agains wall, as we say. I just let him to prove that is not possible. I let him to yell out and I am just thinking that in that moment he feels worse than me and that this behavior is not against me. So at least it helps me to stay calm and not with the feelings I want to kill him NOW” And yeah I tried to think that way and it helped me to stay calm in the moments when I would already hit him to wake him up from his agony. And whole situation resulted in piece on both sides.

So what I have learned: As much as mom stay calm and cold head, the child calms down, eventually, and whole situation can be solved in piece without harming any of the sides. Contrary, if I let him to make my nerves explode, I get very angry. This anger is transmitted to the child and his anger multi plies itself and in the end all of us are crying. So just try my approach and you will see. Hopefully it will help you same way as it helped me.

Now we are already waiting and in few more days Edie will reach his 3 years Bday. So we are preparing celebration for his big day:)

We are also enjoying snow and we also celebrated st. Valentines, the love time for family :)

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How Edie saved me from my own fears and pain

To my beloved son Edie, my savior

This post will be special because of two special reasons. The main player will be Eduardo and the second reason is that this will already touch his mental development.

So I was astonished by his behavior recent days and wanted to share with you.

First case study: I promised Edie to go to theatre with his nursery school group. And I was talking about it with him the whole previous week. Because I know how much he likes to be watching popets and movies and simply. He loves to be reading books and telling stories. So I put into my phone callendar the date and time of the meeting with the group. Not to forget about it.

And the day “D” we woke up quite early, we had breakfast and got dressed to be ready. And because I had in my mind that the meeting time is at 9:30 I was sure that we have plenty of time to reach that meeting place. Also Carlos stayed that day at home because I was supposed to have one business meeting later in the afternoon so for easier logistic purposes he was working from home, so I could leave also Carlitos at home with him. So great combination. I could calmly go only with Edie and enjoy being out for short time.

And then we went to the meeting place inside of the shopping mall. Outside was -10°C so it was a good reason to hide for us. Edie felt few times on the ground outside so he did not look any more that clean and ready for theater, but it did not matter that much for me. But then we were waiting 10 min, 20 min, 30 min…and still nobody else was coming. Then I thought lets check the meeting point on the website of the kinder through my phone. And by reading it…….sh..! I messed the time. I felt sooo sad. By my  silly mistake Edie lost the theatre he enjoys. And curiously in that moment I realize what have happened. That we missed that I apologized to Edie. That I am sorry, that I am silly but I confused the time of meeting with the others.

And then it happened! When he saw my sad face, he looked at me with his big eyes and said. Mom it will be fine. Do not cry! (Even I was not, thought I was about to). He Carresed and touched my head and said:” you know lets go out and enjoy the snow”! It was amazing feeling. He showed so much empathy in his early age. He saw that I am sad and he made my day better. I was so happy from it and started to feel better. I just thought, THANK YOU EDIE

Second case study: I went for Edie to kinder and because there was in the same time our friend Vojta, we decided to go together with him, his mom Ana and Carlitos in the trolley out. There was a fresh new show fall so I decided that it will be nice time for Edie to enjoy the first snow. But I did not consider that I did not prepare myself enough for the coldness outside. There was about -12°C….. brrrr hell cold. But we were walking with Ana and Vojta, talking, Carlitos was sleeping in the trolley, so everything seemed to be fine. Until Carlitos woke up after one hour and started to cry of hunger. But I could not take him out easily to feed him, because breastfeeding in -12°C is nothing pleasant. So I decided and told Edie if we could go home because of Carlitos is crying of hunger and I would prefer to go home because I was freezing. My feet were getting hell cold same as my fingers.

So what happened on the way. Edie since he had bicycle in the snow he was slow, also on purpose, enjoying the ride. He was falling also on the ground because the road was slippery. So in the beginning I understood his snow game but after a while because of crying Carlitos and my freezing body I could not stand more. So I calmly came to Edie and with the pain in my eyes I explained him what is happening. That I am freezing, that my feet and fingers hurts and that Carlitos is crying because of hunger and also that is not good for him to be crying and breathing cold wind. And I asked him if he could speed up to reach our home faster!

And again I saw Edies gase, his big eyes turn to me. He first kissed me on my cheek, after caressed my head and started to go faster. He was falling on the ground many time, without crying even with the mouth full of snow he stood up and continued riding his bike. He was doing his best, even on the places where he used to have problem to ride his bike he was strong and coped with them and overcame them. I was basically running back home, since I did not feel my fingers already. I was promising myself to get new warm shoes. And Edie was really strong. I was proud of him. And again he showed his strong empathy for his mom and he was behaving as big strong boy. And I realized a that moment how much he has grown.

So few facts to consider:

  • Edie is 2 years and 11 month old
  • He is attending nursery school since he was 1,5 year old
  • He got his brother Carlitos when he was 2 years and 2 month old
  • And he is starting to communicate in Czech and Spanish in the same time. So it is not easy to for him to grasp the full meaning of the words.

So while having not full 3 years yet he is according to my feelings very nicely psychically shaped. I am surprised every day. There are moments when he is telling me “I do not want to go home with mom from the kinder. It costs us cry and discomfort but on the other hand if needed he shows how much he cares about me. And how much he loves me. 

And in this special moments I am realizing the meaning of the sentence which said Eliska, the director of the Edie’s kindergarten

You as parent, you should never think that: 3 years of the kids age are like 2*1,5 year. And also 6 years old baby does not mean by its development double 3 years old. Always you have to consider the unique personality of every child, the environment which the baby is exposed to and also the personal characteristics of the child. And now I see, now I learn and now I accept.

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